Bad Day
by BkWurm1
Summary: Chloe is having a bad day at college and it doesn't get better when she comes home to Smallville until she finds a shoulder to lean on. Explains why Gabe, her father, isn't around. Set mid season 5. Chlark..COMPLETE! LOVE ALL REVIEWS
1. Still can have a bad day

_Author's note: Started this last year before Jonathan died as an explanation why Chloe's dad was never around. Will finish quickly. _

Chloe knew all about bad days.

Escaping through a tunnel as an egomaniacal billionaire engineered the explosion of the "safe house" above you, fell in the category of having a bad day.

Seeing your best friend shot and left to die in a ditch while being dragged away to a bunker to await Smallville's destruction by nuclear warhead and subsequently having to kill your abductor, also easily qualified as a bad day.

In order to avoid suffering from terminal cheerfulness, Chloe learned to keep life in perspective and rarely judged her regular day-to-day existence by those standards. Therefore, with the obvious caveats, Chloe was ready to admit she was having a lousy day.

She told herself chaos was a normal part of college life, but today, all the little things that could go wrong piled up into a list like a bad joke.

She was young, in college, and cramming for her final exams of the winter semester. Only getting a quick hour's worth of sleep wasn't that uncommon. Getting even that hour of sleep meant skipping breakfast in the cafeteria and when she went to make coffee in her dorm room, she dropped the glass carafe, shattering it before any of the precious caffeine made it into a liquid form. She was desperate enough to bum a cup of instant from the neighboring dorm.

On her way out, she snagged her sweater on the door jam and by the end of her first period, it had unraveled almost to the obscene. A perpetually hot and stuffy building housed her second class of the day, but Chloe's wardrobe malfunction forced her to keep her coat tightly wrapped.

Two of her professors arrived late, which cut the testing time short for one while the other went over time, causing her to race to her next class like the sprinter she now knew she was not. She arrived just in time, but broke the heel off her new pair of favorite shoes.

Now, instead of leisurely taking her time to pack, she was frantically tossing clothes in a bag. The Planet called and left orders to stop by the office ASAP. Right after squeezing that into her schedule, she was heading home for the weekend. Finally, she'd have a chance to see her dad. They barely had talked since she left for college. On the bright side, she had a deep and meaningful relationship with his voicemail.

She was glad Gabe had a job he truly loved, but even during her senior year of high school, he had been constantly gone on company trips. This weekend, Chloe intended to bridge the distance that had grown between them.

As she was leaving, Chloe left a message telling her Dad to expect her around nine-thirtyish. Hopefully, she wouldn't be too long at The Planet. She would just pop in, find out what they wanted, and still be on the road by five-thirty. Three hours later and she should be pulling into Smallville. It could happen! Or maybe not.

The quick consultation about her submission on the effect on nightlife brought on by a proposed change in bar closings, morphed into helping Trina in editing, Jack in layout, and finally being bribed, bullied, and coerced into covering the tip line. If she expected her article to be included in the next edition, she would need to free up the more experienced staff for the next few hours. Chloe called her dad and left him a message to say she'd be in after midnight.

Finally, she and the highway were one and her favorite CDs helped speed the trip along. There had been a moment just before she left the Planet, when she thought of her bed, soft and warm, and how simply alluring it would be to slip back to her dorm and go to sleep. However, knowing that Lana had a date with Clark and with them expecting Chloe to be gone all weekend, well, the possible unpleasant scenarios rolled out much too vividly for Chloe to risk it..

Chloe stopped several times for refueling, for both her car and herself. Caffeine kept her moving; but still, as she entered Smallville city limits, she was fighting off exhaustion. Her phone rang and with pleasure, she saw her dad's cell number flashing. "Hello," she answered cheerily, "called to talk me through that final stretch. Hello?"

For a moment, she thought they had lost their connection and then she heard him sigh and say, "I was hoping you hadn't left Metropolis yet."

"Why, what's wrong?" She asked in confusion.

"I'm here at the airport. My flight is leaving in five minutes. I'm sorry for the mix up, but I won't be around this weekend." He sounded brisk, business like, and a not a bit like the man who had been everything to her after her mother left. "We can talk next week."

Swamped with disappointment, Chloe tried to put on a brave face. "Sure, when you get back. I suppose something last minute came up at work." Gabe didn't pick up her hint to elaborate, but in the background, she heard an announcer on the loudspeaker clearly say, "Last call for flight 457 to Aruba, last call for boarding flight 457 to Aruba…"

Gabe broke in, "I've got to go, they just announced the final boarding for my flight; have a…" He paused. "Goodbye."


	2. Who's sleeping in my bed now?

Chloe pulled off to the side of the road, stunned. He knew she was coming tonight. They planned this visit more than two weeks ago. It was one of the rare times she found him at home and had spoken to him live, not trading messages. He'd said sure, come on down. They hadn't spoken since, but she left him several messages, just checking in and had mentioned their coming plans. In addition, tonight, she must have left him three or four messages about her arrival time. Why hadn't he let her know ahead of time? Didn't he care anymore?

Chloe felt tears stinging the back of her eyes. She was so tired. She needed to get some sleep and maybe some perspective. She probably was overreacting. Chloe pulled her red VW back on the road and with a silence that suited her morose mood drove the few remaining miles to the apartment she had shared with her dad the last few years.

Immediately when she turned onto her street, she knew her night was not over. Cars lined the street and all the windows belonging to the apartments were ablaze. She could see shadows milling past the shades and music burst into the night whenever the lobby doors opened.

Their building had been quickly turning into mostly student housing for those over at Kansas State. By what she could see, the transformation was complete and not only was the kegger happening tonight, but also from the silhouettes crowded in front of the second floor window, it was happening in her Dad's apartment.

She double-parked, brushed past those staggering out the entrance, and took two stairs at a time up to the second floor. Most of the doors to the individual apartments were propped open, including 21A where Chloe spent her senior year sleeping on the fold out sofa. Students of varying legal drinking ages and varying levels of inebriation plugged up the doorway. Being small had some advantages and she wiggled and wormed her way inside.

Looking around the apartment, she felt she must have made a mistake. Where was the sofa and its lumps that she wrestled with nightly? Where were the copper plated pots and pans that hung from the kitchen wall that she and Gabe picked up for a song at a garage sale (even though neither of them ever had time to cook)?

She grabbed a random sleeve and demanded, "Whose apartment is this?" They pulled out of her grasp without answering. She darted over to those huddled around the tap and asked again, "Whose apartment in this?" This time someone waved her over toward the small balcony doors. "Is this your apartment?" She tried finding out again.

A guy of medium color and build straightened up from the wall and from a noticeably uninterested brunette. When he switched his attention to Chloe, the girl made her escape. Not to be discouraged, he flashed Chloe a smile, obviously thinking his luck had changed. "Yeah, this is my humble abode and my door is always open for such loveliness as yours. Haven't we met before?"

Chloe was not in the mood for flirting or such cheesy opening lines. "How long have you lived here?" The guy was still staring at her as if trying to place her face and didn't answer soon enough. "How long?" She barked her question at him.

"Chill, I just moved in a couple weeks ago," he replied and then snapped his fingers and said, "you're the chick in the picture. You used to live here. I totally have a box of your stuff still."

"Two weeks?" Chloe didn't want to believe that could be right, but her head was starting to pound and she just wanted to get out of there; but not before she got the box left behind. Maybe it contained some explanation to this bizarre situation. "Yeah, I'm here for my box. I need it right now."

"Sure, whatever," he said gesturing her to follow to what used to be her father's bedroom. He cleared off a few sweatshirts and pizza boxes to reveal a medium sized box clearly marked CHLOE in red marker. Chloe seized the box, snatched a framed photo off his nightstand, and made for the exit. She fought against the crowd until she was able to slip down the stairs and get to her car.

Chloe plopped the box on her passenger seat and glanced at the picture she'd taken from the nightstand. She recognized it as the one her father took of her before Senior Prom. She did not want to dwell on why it was sitting next to that guy's bed.

She briefly flipped through the box. It was full of photo albums and file folders. She recognized her birth certificate in one. There also was a plain white, sealed envelope tucked in the file. Her name was written on the back in what looked like the same red marker used to identify the box. Dread curled through her stomach and her courage faltered. She'd wait to open the letter.

Pausing only long enough to swallow an aspirin, she was heading toward the Talon, hoping to stay with Lois when she remembered her cousin was gone for the month, once again looking for Lucy with her Dad. She swallowed another aspirin and changed course for the Kent's farm. She almost would have rather gone to a motel than to have to try to explain what was going on, but she really couldn't afford one and she didn't dare drive back to Metropolis tonight.

During this last week of finals, sleep had not been a priority and in the last forty-eight hours, her head touched the pillow for only two of them. Chloe knew her limits and they were rapidly approaching the driving off the road into a telephone pole stage. Not only was she exhausted, but her concentration was shattered. Her mind kept spinning and conjuring up explanations while at the same time she tried not to think about what was happening.

It was after one before she turned into the Kent's drive. As expected, the lights were all off and even though the temperature was barely above freezing, briefly Chloe considered the possibility of sleeping in her car rather than waking them up. She chided herself for being silly and went up to knock on their door. Before long, the porch light came on.


	3. Port in the storm

_Author's note: Remember, this takes place before Lana died and then was not dead and then Lois almost dies, but doesn't and then Jonathan Kent dies and stays that way but makes cameo appearances in a few episodes._

The lights from a vehicle turning into their driveway woke him up instantly. Jonathan Kent rolled over to read the clock; it was just after one. Clark must be home early, he thought. Before he could fall back asleep, a knock came at the door. He sat up at the same time as Martha. She looked at him with concern and moved to put on her robe. Jonathan pushed back the covers and told Martha, "Let me go first."

Downstairs he flipped on the porch light and peered out the window. "It's Chloe," he announced to his wife. He hurried to open the door and motioned her to come inside. "Is something wrong?" he asked.

Martha rushed forward asking at the same time, "Is Clark alright?"

Chloe swiftly assured them, "I'm sure Clark is fine, there is nothing really that wrong. I mean, no one's hurt, no meteor freaks, it's just," Chloe could feel her face crumpling and tears swam past her vision. Martha with concern put her hand on Chloe's shoulder, but Chloe stepped back. Martha's added sympathy was more than Chloe could take. As it was, she was barely hanging on to any sort of composure.

"Chloe, honey, what's wrong?" Martha gently asked.

Chloe dashed away any impending tears and took a steadying breath. "I'm not really sure, but there was some kind of mix up with my dad being home and I was hoping I could stay here tonight, maybe just crash on your couch. I'm just so tired. Maybe I'm overacting."

"Of course you can stay; I'll just make up Clark's bed."

"No, really; the couch would be great," Chloe, insisted. She didn't need something else to stay up obsessing over.

"Alright," Martha agreed. "I'll get some bedding for the couch."

Jonathan, who had been quietly observing, walked over toward the couch and the fireplace facing it. "I'll just add a log and stoke up the fire." Shelby, disturbed from his slumber in front of the hearth, stretched and padded over to Chloe. The golden retriever nudged her hands to remind her of what she should do with them. "Chloe, do you have anything you need out of the car?" Jonathan inquired.

Absently petting Shelby, Chloe told him, "Yes, I'll go grab my bag." At the door she paused and said, "You have no idea how much I appreciate you letting me stay, I didn't know where else to go."

Jonathan turned to look at her and spoke sincerely, "We've known you for too many years and you've been too good of a friend to Clark to stand on formality; you're always welcome."

Chloe, unable to speak, just turned to go. Martha came down the stairs a moment later. "Where's Chloe?"

"Went out to get her stuff, plus I think I made her cry again." Jonathan finished up with the fire and started to help Martha make up the couch.

"Poor girl, something is really bothering her. Have you heard anything about her father lately?"

"No. Come to think of it, I don't think I have even seen him since right after the meteor shower."

"I wonder why she didn't stay at her dad's apartment." Martha plumped up the pillow and placed it at the head of the couch. "Well, it's late. We won't interrogate her when she's feeling this emotional."

"I'm sure things will make more sense in the morning," Jonathan said as he went to open the door for Chloe. She had her overnight bag and was carrying a box with her name on it. "What's in the box," he asked and then wished he hadn't when a wave of sadness flashed over her face.

"Not sure, but I didn't want to leave it out in the cold just in case." She set the box down by the couch and then knowing she couldn't leave the subject at that, pressed on. "I found out tonight that my father no longer lives in the apartment over on Tower Street. The box was left behind"

Surprised, Martha asked, "Where did he move to?"

That same wave of pain crossed over Chloe's face as she tried to nonchalantly shrug and say, "Don't know."

Martha took in Chloe's drained, almost defeated expression and said, "Get some sleep. We can talk in the morning. I'm glad you came to us." With a quick hug to Chloe she then turned and sheparded her husband to the stairs.

Chloe waved them goodnight, as she once again couldn't speak. She wearily sank on to the couch and put her head down in her hands trying to hold back the tears. Shelby scooted close, put his head down on her lap and leaned into her. A quiet sob escaped her lips and she found herself sliding to the floor and wrapping her arms around Shelby. With her face buried in his furry pelt, she let the hot, stinging tears fall. Shelby wagged his tail and whined in doggy sympathy.

Chloe tried to convince herself that the tears were from being overtired, but she was too savvy a seeker of truth to deceive herself completely. Though she told herself that she was overreacting, reaching conclusions with few real facts; a notion kept returning like the kind of hunch she'd come to trust over the years. Gabe had left the country knowing she was coming. He had moved out of the apartment probably before she'd even made plans to visit. A part of her wondered if he intended to come back. A part of her even knew why he might not.


	4. Driving and thinkin'

Clark was used to getting to places fast. Lana starting college in Metropolis forced him to slow down. Explanations came easy enough on how he'd got there for casual visits; he'd say he caught a ride with a friend from school or took the bus. However, date nights meant he needed the truck and that meant getting to Metropolis the old fashion way, three hours to drive there and the matching three hours back.

Surprisingly, he found he didn't mind the enforced slow pace. Like so many other physical acts, driving came easy to him. He didn't have to devote much attention to what he was doing and often he'd catch up on his reading assignments for school, just glancing down periodically. Sometimes he just let the music blast and enjoyed the moment. Other times, though, he ended up with too much time to think.

Three hours meant he had time to plan his weekend chores, decide on which courses he'd take next semester, and it gave him time to think about those campus interviews Chloe wanted him to do. He figured they'd meet this weekend while she was in town, probably order pizza and rent a movie too.

He found time on the drive home to think about his parents. Twenty years together and they were still madly in love. He then briefly, very briefly, thought of what kind of night they likely had while he was gone. It was a safe bet to assume they took advantage of the privacy his absence brought; getting the house to themselves was still rare. They needed nothing more than the opportunity and each other to make the night special. Which lead him right back to the one thing he didn't want to think about; his night.

His night had consisted of a date with Lana, a staple of his high school fantasies. Technically, the date went fine. They went to dinner and a movie. They didn't fight and they kept up the conversation, no awkward pauses. Because Lana had some work to do for her astronomy class at the Observatory, they ended their date around ten-thirty. He kissed her good night and headed home; but still something about their evening seemed off.

They were in a relationship, were dating, and she was just as he always dreamed. When they were together, she was sweet, lovely, and seemed happy to be with him; but was that enough? Why did he feel like something was missing, as if he needed something more?

During those weeks when his powers were gone, he had felt connected to her, could imagine a future. Being with her had felt natural and right. Lately their time together felt flat.

Since he regained his powers, he had to remind himself that nothing really had changed. Not with Lana, she was the same person. However, that feeling of naturalness was gone. He was back to keeping secrets. But it was worse than just that.

He was good at keeping secrets and not telling Lana was surprisingly easy. It wasn't only that he was used to not talking about that part of himself. He was used to saving that part for other people, for his parents and, for a little while, Pete. When talking with Pete, Clark never felt the weight of all the emotional baggage that came with worrying his parents about his abilities and problems. Pete was gone, but now, he had Chloe.

He knew he should want to tell Lana so they could be honest with each other and develop their relationship, but he held back. He knew he had good reasons for not telling her, but he realized he didn't feel that old overpowering urge to share his secret and that concerned him. Some of his other actions confused him too.

Back before he had regained his powers, there was no way would he have just gone on home. Her class work couldn't have kept her busy for more than a few hours and the truck didn't need to be back until tomorrow morning. Chloe was even out of the dorm for the night. He didn't know what his lack of passion signified, but Lana hadn't suggested that he stay either. She hadn't even asked about the possibility. It just hadn't come up.

Now he was almost back to Smallville with the weekend stretching out before him and he wouldn't be spending it with his girlfriend and the only part of that scenario that really bothered him was acknowledging how little it bothered him.


	5. Hug

The driveway to the farm flashed past him. Clark put the truck in reverse and backed up to the gravel driveway leading to the house. He had been too caught up in disturbing thoughts to noticed it until he drove right past.

As he turned in, he flipped the headlights off and used his night vision to navigate down the drive. The covert drive was standard operating procedure when he was returning home late. Too often, his dad had the uncanny habit of instantly waking up when the lights hit the house and too often, that led to his dad waiting for him when he went in the house. True, his parents hadn't enforced curfew since Clark was fifteen, but he didn't want to answer questions about his date tonight when he was so ambivalent about his relationship with Lana.

Before he came to a complete stop, he saw Chloe's very distinctive fire engine red VW Bug convertible parked in front of the barn. Chloe was here? He knew from Lana just how much Chloe was looking forward to spending time with her father, so something had to be wrong. He was convinced had either of his parents been hurt someone would have gotten a hold of him, but Chloe might not have called if something were wrong on her end.

Just to be safe, before he went inside, he used his x-ray vision to scope out the house. His parents where safely in bed, but he could make out Chloe huddled on the floor in front of the fireplace, leaning onto Shelby. With his super hearing, he listened and heard her breath catch and break every time she inhaled and again on exhalation. Clark felt a pang in his chest; she had been crying.

Wasting no more time, Clark quickly unlocked the door and went inside. Shelby came strolling over to greet him while Chloe scrambled to her feet, swiping at her eyes with her shirtsleeves.

Sounding surprised, Chloe called his name, "Clark". She went on, her voice husky from extended tears, "You're back. I didn't think you'd be here. I mean, I thought you were in Metropolis." As she rambled, she backed away from the light shed by the fire, seeking the shadows to hide the traces of ravaged emotion on her face.

Clark couldn't recall seeing Chloe like this. She tightly wrapped her arms around her torso, like she desperately needed something or someone to hold on to, and the vibrant energy that normally swirled around her was missing. Her studied stillness made her appear fragile and he had an overpowering need to provide comfort. He crossed the room speaking softly, "Chloe, what's wrong."

Before she could respond, he was there in front of her, looking down. He gently grasped her by the elbows and pulled her close, enfolding her in his arms. He tucked her head against his chest and rested his chin on it. For a moment, she indulged in the sheer heat and comfort radiating from his body.

He asked again, "What's wrong?" Chloe just shook her head and said nothing. "Chloe, talk to me, tell me what's the matter", he continued to entreat.

In a small and muffled voice she and said, "I'm just having a bad day."

"It's more than that. What's going on?" He asked while he softly stroked her back. "Why aren't you staying with your dad at his apartment?" She tensed and started to push away, but he held on to her and Chloe just didn't have the energy to fight. He continued lightly rubbing her back until she relaxed.

"He doesn't live there anymore," she finally simply said.

Clark didn't expect that. "He moved?"

Clark felt Chloe shrug and say, "I guess."

"You didn't know," Clark deduced. "Do you know where he is now?"

Chloe stepped back from his comfort, too restless to stay still. "On his way to Aruba, I think. He called just as his flight was boarding to say he wouldn't be around. I thought at first he was going on another one of those business trips, but his company doesn't work outside the United States. So he must have gone on vacation or something"

"But you've been planning this visit for weeks," Clark was upset on her behalf.

"Guess that didn't matter," Chloe replied sounding more despondent.

"Do you know when he gets back?" He asked, wondering silently if chewing out his best friend's dad was allowed.

"He said he'd talk to me next week, but …," she trailed off as she ran a hand raggedly through her hair and turned away.

"But what?" Clark prompted

Chloe looked up at the ceiling and tried blinking back the tears. They didn't fall but the catch was back in her voice. "I…I don't know if...if he is coming back."

"Not come back? Why wouldn't he come back?" Clark was truly baffled. This was her father they were talking about. He knew she and her dad weren't as close as they once were and Gabe did miss their graduation, however short it was cut; but how could their relationship get so bad that her father would just disappear from her life. His skepticism must have showed because Chloe stiffened under his gaze, her spine going straight, and a cynical gleam lit her eyes.

"Oh, I don't really know. Maybe I'm making up the whole thing. Maybe there's a perfectly logical explanation for everything. I'm probably just hallucinating, or went to the wrong apartment, got a wrong number, or am finally going crazy. I mean, hey, why disappoint everyone?" Chloe laughed without any delight, gathered herself and shook her head. "Only I'm not imagining things and there is a letter."

"A letter, from whom?"

"At the apartment, the new guy who lives there had a box of stuff with my name on it and there was an envelope for me too."

"What did the letter say?" he asked gently.

Chloe's face twisted in a wry fashion. "I couldn't open it. It's going to be bad."

"Maybe, but you won't know until you read it."


	6. Steel threads

Chloe knew she needed more than just friendship in the end, but the past had taught her to value the level of closeness they had now. In this moment while she confirmed her fears, she trusted in that friendship to keep her sane. "Would you read it?" She asked softly and pointed to an envelope peeking over the edge of the box at the end of the sofa.

Clark reached for it and then sat down on the couch. Chloe settled lightly next to him, starring deeply into the heart of the flames dancing in the hearth. He tore open the flap and pulled out a single sheet of paper. He scanned the contents.

_Dear Chloe,_

_If you are reading this letter then you already know I've moved out of the apartment. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to tell you everything in person, but I think you know by now that I'm not coming back. I've met someone and she and I are going to get lost in the Caribbean. I found a way to make that life possible and finally be happy._

_You don't need me. I know you will be fine on your own. You've been taking care of both of us since you were twelve. You are strong in mind, character, and ambition. I know I have blamed you sometimes because of that. As I've said before, I've come to understand some of the decisions you have made that led us to this place. I hope you can understand mine. I need to move on with my life and I don't want to stand in the way of yours. The best way for both of us is to go our separate ways. _

_I'll always love you._

_Gabe Sullivan_

_P.S. I sent some other things to the General that you might want._

Rage boiled in his stomach. How could Gabe do this to his daughter? He wrote to Chloe as casually as if he was breaking up with his high school girlfriend. Clark glanced over at Chloe. She was hurting already; holding back wasn't going to make it better, but he had to fight back the urge to lie to her, to protect her from this pain.

"What does it say?" She asked more calmly than he expected.

"Not much", he deferred for the moment.

"But it does say he's not coming back, doesn't it" she stated without a hint of doubt.

He nodded and but she wasn't looking at him. "Yes," he said aloud, "I'm sorry." Words were so inadequate right now. Clark couldn't stop watching Chloe. Usually a myriad of emotions played across her face, but now, he no idea what she thought as she solemnly stared into the leaping flames.

Chloe didn't glance away from her study of the changing embers. "What exactly did he say?"

Chloe listened as from a distance while Clark recited the brief note her father penned to sever their lives. His voice sounded hollow and far away as he confirmed the letter's message and quashed her last hopes. Was her father right? Would it be for the best?

She floated unfeeling and insensate to that moment's reality, mesmerized by hypnotic patterns flickering in the grate, holding out for just a little while longer against the wave of regret and sadness that soon would come crashing down. Numbness offered escape and she turned to it, wanting to wrap its protection around her soul. She tried so hard to bring back that close relationship they used to have; but nothing she had done changed how her father felt about her since… How could one mistake have so many repercussions?

Chloe looked down at her hands, her fingers tightly laced together. She deliberately unthreaded her fingers but didn't notice they immediately tightened into fists until she felt the sting of her nails biting into her palms.

Clark reached over and covered her clenched fist resting on her thigh. He rubbed his thumb over her whitened knuckles. With his touch, brought a rush of feelings and she was no longer drifting. Such a slight contact, a wispy bond made of steel threads, anchoring her to the reality of the past, present, and a dimly lit future with no promises.

"He used to hold my hand." Chloe looked at Clark's hand covering her own. "Way after most dads stop holding their kid's hands or way after they let them; he used to still hold my hand." Chloe glanced up at Clark and gave him a chagrined half smile. "Made me feel safe when I was little and then when I was older, I just felt so connected to him. After Mom disappeared, we were a team, us against the world." Chloe paused and then added fiercely, "That was real."

"I know." Clark agreed, hearing her insistent tone.

Clark's quick affirmation was soothing. "Even when I when I hit my teens and I knew it was uncool, I still wanted that connection, wouldn't give it up," She shook her head. "He was my Dad, but we were pals too. The first time we really fought was when he told me he took the job in Smallville and we were leaving Metropolis. I was so mad. Hurt too, because he didn't ask me, just came home and out of the blue we were moving and that was it, no discussion."

"But you made up."

"Yeah, we were back to normal before we left Metropolis. And then he was so great about letting Lana live with us." Chloe ended with a wistful look.

"What happened?" Clark ventured wanting to know, but knowing Chloe needed to get it all out even more. "The letter says you know something about why he chose to leave."

She sighed and looked away. For a few minutes, Chloe stared into scarlet embers seething in the fireplace. Shelby snored quietly on the rug. The wind howled outdoors and the fire crackled companionably. Clark wondered if Chloe would respond, but after a moment she slowly in a world-weary voice told him, "People leave. They have their own life, agenda, and mine butts up against that. I just don't inspire people to stick around."

He pressed, refusing to accept such self-loathing. "I don't believe that. What really happened?"

Too tired to resist his questions, Chloe slipped her hand out from under his and wearily rubbed her face, "My deal with the devil gone wrong, I shouldn't be surprised I'm still paying the price."

"Lionel?" Clark blinked in surprise. "This is somehow linked to you giving him information about me."


	7. Something

Lionel Luther. Chloe didn't like to think how close she'd come to complete disaster. How tempting Luther had made turning her hurt back against the ones hurting her. How easily she convinced herself that she could get what she wanted and not have to worry about the cost. She had a hard time reconciling how naïve she had been. "This is more linked to when I refused to give him information," she answered with a wry smile.

"I know Lionel got your dad fired," Clark prompted, still confused.

Chloe swallowed and tried to explain, "If I hadn't tried to play Lionel Luther, none of this would have happened. Not only did Lex fire my dad, but Lionel also made sure he couldn't get another job anywhere close to Smallville. I finally told my father what was going on before I testified and we went into protection. I had to explain that it was my fault he couldn't get a decent job, that Lionel blacklisted him."

"When I told him, he didn't believe me at first." Chloe leaned forward and wrapped her arms around herself, warding off the chill of her impending memory. "Then someone called the apartment and said how easy getting his old job could be if he just controlled his daughter. All his problems would have gone away if I just agreed to back down and give Lionel what he wanted, who he wanted."

"But you wouldn't do it."

Chloe shook her head and added intensely, "I'll never give Lionel a chance at that kind of control again." She went on more quietly, "But my dad didn't want me to go against Lionel, said he was too powerful. I know he was furious when I testified for putting our lives at risk, for ruining his life…just like my mother tried to."

"He said that?" Clark asked stunned.

"Only once," she quickly said, in slightly defensive tones. "Once we were in hiding he never complained, but I caught him watching me, looking at me like he was seeing a stranger."

Chloe lowered her head and added in a confessional tone, "I used to get that look from him back when I started putting up the wall of weird at home. He said I shouldn't indulge other people's lunacy, but I think he meant mine. I took it down and moved it to the Torch."

Clark thought about it for a moment. "Is that why you didn't tell me about it at first?"

"Yeah," Chloe admitted. "I didn't want to see that look on my friend's faces."

Clark thought of all the knowledge Chloe had collected, all the times when he had questions and she had answers. "He was wrong. The attention you paid to what was going on in Smallville probably saved a lot of lives."

"No, you were the one that made that difference," Chloe demurred.

"But without you I wouldn't have known."

Chloe met his eyes and the appreciation she saw there unnerved her. With a blush, she quickly changed the subject. "Yeah, well, anyway, after that I couldn't talk to him the same way. I guess it's natural, as you get older to grow apart. I didn't know about my mother then, but now I wonder if he started looking for the same signs in me. There were cracks in our relationship, but the real rift started when I challenged Lionel."

Chloe paused, searching for answers internally. She brought her legs up on the couch and wrapped her arms around her knees. "I thought if I could just prove myself, one day things would get better. But every time anything strange happened or there was a brush with danger, he'd get that look in his eyes. I thought he would be proud when I got the job at the Daily Planet, but he..."she trailed off.

"But he what?" Clark prompted.

Chloe bit her lip and looked away before answering. "He asked me if he should keep a suitcase packed and be ready to go back in hiding for the next time I cross someone like Lionel Luther. Turns out he thought the reason I tried to put Lionel away was part of a plan to boost my shot at becoming a reporter."

"Why would he think that?" Clark asked, surprised once again.

Chloe turned and looked him squarely in the eye, willing him to understand. "My father wasn't the only one to get blacklisted. After Lionel went to jail, I still couldn't get a job or an internship at a paper. I once even used Lois's name to get an article printed, the editor wouldn't touch it with my name attached."

Chloe stopped and took a deep breath before revealing her final secret. "Dad decided the reason I wanted to testify against Lionel was to get my credentials back and at the same time have the inside exclusive on what brought Lionel Luther down. He couldn't understand why I wouldn't just give Luther what he wanted. He said I was just being selfish, only thinking of myself or I would have gotten his life back."

Clark fought to keep from interrupting. Didn't Gabe know his own daughter? How could he think she could be so coldly calculating?

"We talked it out and I told him I just wouldn't be under that kind of control again. That I wasn't angling for anything but power over my own life. I thought he understood. I guess he didn't entirely believe me, didn't really trust me." Chloe rested her cheek on her knees, too tired to hold her head up on her own. "I thought our relationship was getting better. Now, he's gone and… it's my fault. I never thought he would leave; and now I'm alone.

"You are not alone." Clark interjected.

"I sound like a fool. I suppose I deserve anything I get."

"You don't deserve this, you don't sound like a fool, and you're not alone." Clark insisted, willing her to listen to him.

Chloe turned her head to look at him. No, she wasn't alone. Not right now. Right now, she had someone there for her, a shoulder to lean on. She wouldn't try to fool herself that she would always have his attention, but she was through with trying to be strong tonight. He was here; solid, real, and the only one she counted on as much as she had her father.

"I'm sorry I'm being so melodramatic. I can't think straight, I'm so tired," she said while she rubbed her face in her hands.

"Oh, I should let you get some rest," Clark leaned forward to get up.

"Don't go." Chloe gasped and snatched at Clarks forearm, slightly panicked by the notion of his absence. Clark settled back, but waited for Chloe to finish. Chloe felt flushed and exposed at her sudden admission of need, but was able to ask shyly, "Would you mind staying with me for awhile?" The words were barely past her lips before she started to feel akward. "I mean, you don't have to. I'll be ok if you don't want to, but as great as Shelby is for company…sometimes, sometimes you need something more." Chloe found herself trailing off when Clark's gaze turned intense.

Clark heard her words and remembered his own troubled thoughts from earlier in the night. Something more, sometimes you need something more. He didn't realize he had spoken aloud until Chloe softly murmured yes, and broke eye contact. For another heartbeat, Clark was overwhelmed with feelings, needs, and emotions until he felt Chloe shiver next to him.

"You're cold," he said, and pushed back his thoughts while he wrapped Chloe in a blanket and pulled her close.

Chloe found herself half sprawled on Clark's chest and cocooned in not only the soft comforter Mrs. Kent had left, but also snuggly enveloped in Clark's arms. "You'll stay," she said not asking, but affirming.

"Yeah, I'll stay, just try to relax," he said even as he could feel the tension draining out of Chloe. He glanced down at Chloe's face resting on his plaid shirt. With her eyes closed, her lashes formed dusky shadows on her pale cheeks. The lines and furrows that worry and weariness had caused were smoothing out of her brow. He couldn't resist stroking her hair and promising, "Tomorrow will be better."

Already half asleep, Chloe snorted and mumbled, "Couldn't be much worse." She paused for a jaw-popping yawn, sighed, and went on to say, "well, except for when someone's tried to kill you or me or…"

"Go to sleep Chloe." Clark instructed smiling.

Chloe fell off to sleep immediately; however, Clark found it harder to relax. His mind swirled around everything Chloe had told him.

He had known her father lost his job and had found out later that Lionel kept him from getting another job locally, but to think Chloe had within her power the ability to return everything taken from her father. Instead, Clark realized, she had chosen to keep his secrets over her own family's welfare. She had chosen to keep secrets she wasn't even privy to.

A part of him wondered why or even how she could have made such sacrifices. A corner of his mind screamed an answer he shied from hearing.

Had he really known how desperately important she was to him and his future, how greatly she had protected him? He looked at her sleeping form and felt a rightness of being here when she needed him. She held so much strength, so much energy in such a compact, deceptively delicate package. Could he ever risk losing her by trading their friendship for something more?

Something more. He was with Lana. Did he need something more? Clark felt his mind going fuzzy. He wasn't physically exhausted, but the crackle of the fire and the low light flickering in the hearth served to remind him of sleep. Clark listened to Chloe's rhythmic breathing and felt the steady beat of her heart. He closed his eyes and began to drift. He didn't have all the answers tonight, but he'd make sure Chloe knew how important their friendship was to him and maybe, somewhere in the future, he'd tell her something more.

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_Author's note: I know in some ways it would be more satisfying to have this end with Clark's undying declaration of love (and yeah, he should have figured this out already), but in my mind I can slip this into their past and still accept the current story line unfolding now. Maybe my next tale will be a little more substantial._


End file.
